Hawai'i Suite Life

Mary, slogging through the Intertube trenches found a very nice deal and we're staying at the Ritz-Carlton Kapalua. I think - as is usually the case with island place names there's a lot of a's and u's so if I threw in a couple of extra, it's an honest mistake. I have a theory that Hawaii is where the extra vowels ended up after emigrating from Eastern Europe. I wouldn't say that it's necessarily a good theory but it's mine, all mine.

Rack rate at the Ritz-Carlton usually entails signing over one's first born but we weren't required to do that this time, which is fortunate as we have no borns - first or otherwise. I may have signed an option giving the Ritz Carlton Company, LLC an option on a kidney but since there's a chance that I've damaged them to the point where even South American organ theft gangs would turn their noses up at them, I feel the joke's on the Ritz.

Rather than getting a standard room where we would be subjected to interacting with each other more often than the usual once or twice a day, Mary got us a one room villa. Villa is another variant term for suite, or condo, or basically any setup where I can watch TV in a separate room from where Mary is trying to sleep. At the Ritz the villas are in a separate wing attached to the main hotel and share all the same amenities like maid service, room service, and turn down service. Like other suite hotels there is a kitchenette which has a microwave, refrigerator/freezer and sink. There's also a dishwasher but interestingly enough there are no provisions for a cooktop or an oven. Mary pointed out later that it's probable that these are not installed in the villas in order to keep cooking aromas to a minimum. Which I appreciate, if only so I never have to smell another heaping pot of brussels sprouts being boiled past all conceptions of human decency. Strangely enough our one bedroom villa had a kitchen table constructed from a slab of granite large enough to park a car on. I don't know why it is necessary to equip the villa that can sleep at most, a total of four people, with a table than can seat them and all their friends, college roommates, and the country club membership committee. It's also set at such a height that it's necessary to sit on stools to reach the top of the table. Mary loathes stools. Comes from having short, little legs so she either has to setup a ladder in order to climb onto the stool or take a running jump. Either method is a laugh riot, but only for me, and then I usually pay for it later and painfully at that.

The villa besides the usual features found in large suite-like accommodations, also had balconies off both the living room and the bedroom. This made it convenient for us both to enjoy the fresh, salty sea air without having to share our chaise lounges. Bonus.

So what did we have to pay for this retreat from the cares of the world? Well, for the room we were in the rack rate is normally $795 to $995 per night. Mary got a deal where we averaged a total of $476 per night with an additional $100 a day resort credit to be applied to food, booze or in Mary's case - the spa. So less than half the rack rate overall. And this isn't unusual. Everywhere in Hawaii the rates for a stay are extremely reasonable right now, and I think they'll be that way for the foreseeable future.

One thing I'm going to expand on at a later time is the economics of the type of unit we stayed in, a residential suite which is wholly owned by a private individual and rented out by the hotel as opposed to just being a hotel guest.